Australia Part II

Shall blog a brief recount about my Australia trip Part II around 2 months ago.

Our training area is located about 180km north Brisbane. The plane touched down at Rockhampton airpot at 2025hrs. 3 hours later, after the collection of our luggage and settling the administration matters, we reached our training area by coach. The temperature at night reached as low as 17 degree Celsius which was rather cooling. The sun rises around 0445 and sets before 1800. During the period when we were there, the area was in the transition from cold to hot and humid weather. Hence the nights were felt to become less cold. Thankfully it wasn't very humid and so the days were still bearable, much better than Darwin, with max temperature around 31 C.

Both the accomodation and toilet facilities couldn't be anywhere near satisfactory level compared to the previous training area. Imagine yourself sleeping above soil and ash (due to the recent burning), or having to muster strength to pull the buckets of filled water up, using simple pulley system that is primarily made of rope, after a tiring day just to bathe to feel clean. And imagine that whenver you wipe your face with wet tissue, it always turned out to be black; or blow your nose and it's black too. It's all due to the ash.

Though the living conditions weren't as good compared to the previous traning area, I would prefer the training in Rockhampton to that in Darwin. Basically, it's because I had got less things to do. That's why. Haha. Anyway, I sustained yet another injury. I hurt my left thumb with a 5-kg hammer while trying to knock some metal out. There was internal bleeding, evident from my thumb nail. Luckily, I could still move my thumb and so there was no fracture. The dried up blood is still visible now inside my nail.

I also enjoyed my free-and-easy time more. We stayed a night over at Welcome Home motel. Indeed, everything was much like you've come home, cosy and heartwarming. At night, we decided to explore the small little town of North Rockhampton and bought a bottle of Whiskey, and Breaka milk from Coles situated inside the new plaza, whose name I have forgotten. We rented a DVD too, Sex Traffic, and watched it while drinking Whiskey mixed with coffee milk. Anyway, the movie was about the illegal trading of women to brothels in eastern Europe - to me, it's too sad a story that I wouldn't want to finish watching it and left to sleep midway through. I had bacon with egg for breakfast the next morning. It's delicious even though the bacon was a bit too salty.

Some 'interesting' happenings to share: There's this strip dancer bar or something in the small town which, according to our coach driver, only open at 2230. As we were required to be back to our motels by 2300, most of us gave up the idea to take a look or satisfy our curiosity. However, the bar actually opened around 2000 and some of us got lucky enough, in their context, to witness other country's night life. So while some had got back to their motels, some others were enjoying themselves, paying 10 auzis and a strip dancer would do lap dance on you. lol.

Alright, shall stop here. Merry X'mas! God bless!

Back from Australia trip Part I

It's 3 freaking weeks and I was glad that it's over, finally. Well, that's only like Part I of my Australia trip. Part II is just round the corner and everything would be worse.

It's a relief to find out that the accomodation and toilet facilities were not as bad as expected. Well, perhaps we had been through worse than what was presented to us. The only aspect we didn't prepare ourselves for is the hot and dry weather. Cloudless days aren't rare and the dryness is capable of making your lips crack and bleed, which happened to me twice, at least. Drinking water is definitely a must. Speaking of which, the water is way too alkaline. It feels nothing wrong, in fact it feels like mineral water, if you drink only a few gulps of water. However, if you were to drink 500ml at one go, your tongue would be able to sense the bitterness of the water, and it's really bitter till it makes you feel like vomiting, not to mention it makes your throat feel, ironically, dry.

Shan't blog about anything that is prohibited from sharing. I can only say that sleeping is a luxury.

Nothing beats the day on which we were given a day off! I needed a break, quite desperately indeed. It just felt so great without the need to touch hard, solid metals which are so unfeeling and apathetic. As Darwin is a really small city, the group of us explored the whole city in less than half-a-day. Okay, one highlight we found is the topless bar. Lol. The condoms we have could be put to good use. Wait! Watch your thoughts! What I meant was to sell the condoms that were issued to us to those people inside the bar, and we could make money. Well, we didn't, of course, in the end.

An unfortunate accident happened to me. I injured my little finger during my last "working moment". My flesh tore and blood was seen oozing out and soaked my gloves. Yes, it was really painful. I didn't really dare to see the condition of my injury at first. The injury brought me some inconvenience as I was reminded not to get it wet by the medics. One of the attempts made was to wear the condom on my little finger. haha. Well, that was my first time touching a condom and its lubricant. So my crewmate helped me wear the condom, on my little finger of course.
Luckily, my finger could still bend and after verification from my visit to NUH yesterday, there's no fracture.

On the whole, there were happy moments and angry moments for us. Those angry moments were brought about, as usual, by those brainless idiots. Of course, these people shouldn't be the ones occupying our brain. They don't worth a damn to us. In contrast, those happy moments we had had together, whether captured or not by the cameras, shall always be remembered dearly in our hearts. =)

Back to the question: How often do you get to go overseas with your NS friends?
My answer: 3 freaking times, ok?!
laughs...

SOC Test 2

It was about 0720 on Friday morning. I was wearing my full gear, ready for the test. Upon "GO!", I started running at a controlled pace for a distance of 700m. Determined not to repeat the mistake of running too fast lest compromising on my ability and speed for the rest of the test, I decided to time myself this time round.

I took 3 min 45s for the first 700m rundown, which is considered "good timing". It's time for the clearing of obstacles. At the low rope, I grabbed for the rope and tried to pull myself up, while my feet were trying to make a loop for me to step on. Unable to lift myself high enough hence unable to make a complete loop, I dropped to the ground. Not allowing myself too much time to conjure up any negative thoughts, I quickly grabbed for the rope again with the determination to touch the beam. Yes! After successfully making 3 loops, I managed to touch the beam and rushed to clear the rest of the obstacles.

It's the last obstacle, finally. Running halfway up the ramp, I could feel that my legs were tired. Again, not giving myself time to waste on any negative thoughts, I jumped off from the height of 2m. I looked at my watch immediately and found out that I still had 3 min 30s left to run 600m. Realizing that I still had hope of passing, my legs started to move and spread out immediately. I was panting hard. Run...run..run... I looked at my watch again - 2 min left. I continued to run. 1 min left and about 150m left. "I need to run faster!" About 25m left and I looked at my watch once again. 10s was all I had left. I was so close and I ran at my fastest possible speed. Finally, I crossed the finishing line and immediately I bent my body down, trying hard to catch my breath. My friends kept telling me while trying to stretch out my hand to take my number chip but I ignored them. I was breathless and I needed to be left alone so that I had more air for myself. Okay, I told myself, I had to take the number chip or my result would be voided. Then I looked at my watch again. It showed 7s after the passing time. I had no idea how much time I took before I managed to take the number chip from them. Did I pass?

I had no idea. And I didn't want to think about it and I couldn't think because I got a sudden headache everytime I lift up my head. I had to face down with the back of my hand supporting my forehead so that I wouldn't feel so lousy. My heart was still racing and I felt as if I was going to vomit any time. I definitely wasn't feeling well. It lasted for about 20min before I got a little bit better.

My friends asked me if I pass. I told them, "Either on the dot or fail."
It was then time to fall in and our results were made known to us.
"Ming Xian. 9:57." The passing time is 9:59 and below.
I passed!!! Never ever have I dreamt of clearing SOC. I was elated!
HAPPY :)

Then again, seriously, I would have been studying in uni right now if not for you-know-what.
LOL

what life actually is about

I wan enlightened after reading a book "The Way We Are". We tend to assume that we know what life is all about and take them for granted, without giving it a deeper thought. In fact, we know very little of what we are and we are largely the opposite of what we think we are.

What is the main difference between us, the homo sapiens, and the other animals? The enlarged consciousness. And because of this, there's always fear lurking in our minds; fear is constant in our life, even in our pleasures. We never feel safe as we are aware that there are dangers remembered and anticipated, not to mention the fact that we know we will die, eventually. Hence humans seek refuge in strength. (WARNING: MAY BE SENSITIVE...) Man created "infinite intelligence" (so as not to offend anyone's beliefs) and formulated taboos, and sin, morality and guilt come into being. Our fear and weakness impel us to honour these taboos and obey our leaders. This makes possible for few to control the many. Work comes into being which serves no purpose in our life but which is required by "infinite intelligence" who (we have come to believe) will protect us. Servitude is invented.

This was just one of the many lessons I learnt from the book. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who have an open mind to welcome new and unorthodox (perhaps to some) ideas and opinions about who we really are and how nature really works.

It is madness. No treatment is required, indeed none is effective. Loses contact with reality, clutches something one believes to be a treasure while others see plainly no better than a loaf of bread. Perhaps the right way is to accept that it won't last. Accept , not in the sense of resigning one's self to value. I shoulda sad inevitability but in the sense of celebrating a process that unavoidably entails the ending of a passion that presently appears as life's supreme feel an unmixed celebration of what I now have. I should accept change not because I cannot anyway prevent it, but because it is life itself. The beginning and ending, should be praised as one. Phew, my mind is freed!

SOC

Not again! Silver for IPPT. What's next? Simple, wait for the next IPPT to be conducted next month.
It was a stressful one, indeed, with the remedial trainings scheduled on Saturday for those who didn't manage to attain at least a Silver. Such a great relief it was for me when I had, somehow, jumped 234cm for SBJ. I knew that, following which, 2.4km run was the only factor to decide if I still need to take IPPT at all for the rest of the year, which I have not yet able to be excused from. Improvement, personally, is the more important part in every IPPT that I take. I'm glad that I have improved 18 seconds from my previous timing for the run. Still a long way to 9:44 (~40 secs) but if some people had proven that almost 1 minute of improvement is not impossible, there's always chance and hope to achieve what you want. The critical thing is to maintain, at least, a Silver so that I would have one less worry.

SOC - my current nightmare. The actual test is at the end of the month and my best timing is still about 46 seconds behind the passing timing. Have to pace myself for my first run-down or fatigue will overpower my body. Of course, clearing the obstacles must be fast too.

Recently, I am becoming to be a wastrel. Normally, I wouldn't withdraw $ from my account as I would wait till my parents give me some allowance before I would then decide what I want to spend on. No worries for I have figured out the "culprit" behind this - the Great Singapore Sale, which will end by 260709. After this date, I am indubitably certain that I will not withdraw $ so frequently anymore. =]

I have decided that I am going to learn to play some instruments myself - autodidact, that is. What kind of instrument? I haven't decided yet but I am sure I will and can do this. =)

Library is where I have been going to frequently every weekend. There're so many books I want to read, and so much knowledge awaiting me to discover myself. What a fulfilling and wonderful way of spending my free time yeah =p Am craving for more ... busy reading

Back to what I am doing - conscription, outfield will be soon and how I wish I can get it over and done with. Not that I really mind about the stickiness and dirtiness my body would experience but I hate the troubles and inconveniences that I have to put up with, inter alia, setting up of sleeping area, moving about in the dark and using of latrine.

475 days to the three-letter word every NSF is looking forward to (and every regular not giving a damn to) ! =)'

run ...

Shall update my blog...lol
Last week was my company's POP. Was glad that my parents and friends could get to see the gigantic Leopard tanks that we are operating. Though we had only a few rehearsals, due to time constraints, I suppose the whole parade still turned out rather decent. Thanks to the weather too for it stopped raining before the commencement of the parade, or the efforts everybody put in, especially when we worked so hard till 10 pm the night before so as to showcase our best performance possible, would be in vain.

There'll be physical training every single day! -.- 19km - the distance I've run this week, half of the distance was completed this morning. IPPT test next wednesday. Hope I can jump ffffaaaaarrrrrr, and do not rain on that day... Yes, the weather does affect the distance that I could jump.. LOL.

My whole body is suffering from muscle ache. Gonna rest...

IPPT till GOLD

Yet again, I achieved Silver for the IPPT last week. Since I haven't got Gold, I am to take IPPT, again, coming Wed. -.-" Yes, I am to take IPPT until I get Gold. For my IPPT last week, I improved my running timing merely by 4 seconds. At this rate, it's gonna take many months before I could run in less than 9:44. ---------.-----------"

Didn't manage to get marksmanship. Not really disappointed lah, after getting to know the statistics of the number of people who can get marksmanship at their first try. No wonder one can get 200 bucks for hitting the marksmanship since only very few can manage to do it, like only 10%??... Perhaps IPPT is easier. Lolx...

I've accepted NTU Chem and Biochem course. A more practical choice, I guess, especially with the internship they offer. Hope I won't regret. Gonna find out in 1.5 years' time anyway.

Coming week not gonna be an easy week eh. Oh well.
Ok, till then...

which uni???

Now I'm torn between NTU Chemistry & Biological Chemistry and NUS Faculty of Science. The former has a direct honour programme and has internship in the 4th year while the latter is more established, and perhaps more recognized. Yet another dilemma. =\ Currently, I have a better impression on NTU as it has better laboratory facilities and has a new building. However, I'm also concerned about the school's culture and student activities as I wouldn't wanna lead a boring uni life. Advices are most welcomed. =)

Gonna have another IPPT coming Wed. Unsure if I could do well as I have regimental duty the day before which will last through the night. Addtional 100 bucks would, of course, be good! =D

Days ahead will only get tougher with more tedious and tiring trainings that are to come. I know I'm going to have to bear with wearing my sweaty uniform while executing my tasks.

long weekend =)

Heeee...It's the long-awaited long weekend. Labour Day rulez! The next 3-day weekend will be National Day. Gonna spend my precious long weekend wisely!

This week wasn't an easy week eh. Either you pass the tests or you're confined - an effective 'measure' to stress us up so that we'd study.
Had IPPT test and I'm glad that I got Silver! Or rather $100! Hahahaha! Well, I don't really bother about the monetary reward but more on the improvement I'd made. To get Gold, you have to run in less than 9min 44s, as well as getting at least a B in other static stations. Hmmmm....

Blue-black here and there. -.-

554 days to ORD.

post-BMT

POP loh!
Lol, I know it's so so so so so late to say "POP loh". But it seems like they are words that all who've gone through BMT must say, since they appear at every blogs and Facebook of those who've just POP-ed, I should say it too.
BMT: 070109 - 100309
Next date that I'm looking forward to will be my ORD which is on 061110! It seems long but don't we always say time flies? So my ORD will be soon=) (Oh, I'm being optimistic...)

Remember that I mentioned I'd always wanted myself to fall sick ever since my BMT started? Well, I managed to fall sick (fever + headache + cough + running nose), but it occured only after my POP, or during my block leave. So yea, instead of enjoying myself during the first few days of my block leave, I rest at home instead. What a waste. By the way, the block leave that we had was compulsory for us to take. Since everyone is entitled 14 days of leave per year, after the 9 compulsory block leave, we have only 5 days of leave left for the rest of the year. What the... It's only March and there's 9 more months and 5 days of leave is all we have.
Okay, I didn't forget what I just said previously - time flies.

You know what, I was actually very worried when I was checking for my ePosting to find out which vocation I'm assigned to. I strongly do not want to get myself trained in vocations that are infamous for their level of 'siong-ness'. Luckily, I'm posted to HQ ARMOUR. It's not a slack vocation though but it's definitely better than Guards. Moreoever, Tianwei aka Xiao Bai, my bunkmate, is posted to the same vocation as me. Hope we are grouped together and can operate the together. Tomorrow is the day to report to my new unit, hope I can find my way there successfully.

Just being random, I hate Polaramine (Polarax), a drug used to stop running nose but it causes the side-effect of headache! I hate headache! For your information, the 2 most uncomfortable illnesses to me are toothache and headache. To stop the headache, I consumed a tablet of Panadol and I feel much better now.

Besides this naturally-occuring headache, another issue that makes me headache is the order of courses of university. I had a hard time deciding whether FASS or FoS should come before the other. Finally, after putting my interest and future prospects into consideration, I decided that FoS should come before FASS. Hmmm..Hope I can be granted my first or second choice. Sigh, if only I'm smart enough... I just realised that I always tend to attain the second best grade in all my examninations, in PSLE (all A, (there's A* in PSLE!)), O (mostly A2) and A level (mostly B).
v_v"

Oh ya, my neighbour gave me a box of New Moon Chicken Essence just now! She said it's a form of encouragement for whatever I am going through. How nice of her! :D

Alright, I need to go shave now.
I'm so lazy to shave!
Need to wake up early tomorrow in order to reach my unit at 0800.
o_O"
Till then.

烦闷瞬间之作

闷烦
骚恼

Life

生命 色彩 何在

烦闷瞬间之作

枷锁
自己为自己添加
生命不能再无聊
全因为你
使我生命色彩全无

残忍
你从何开始
就对我惩罚
水波的荡漾
从未停过
心中的伤痛
亦未停止
你是否能感受
我心在嘶喊的震荡
难道你
没半点丝毫的怜楚
管不着我心灵的痛否？

坚强的外表
洒脱的外在
全皆装作无事之酝酿
你没感受出来么？
我们之间已建立的关系
就如此轻易忘却吗？

简单的问候
灿烂的微笑
诚恳的关心
今日都是奢求
人生的悲哀
我, 无能为力

水瓶座

highly true (",)

水瓶座

几乎每个水瓶座的心底都有着一段刻骨铭心人间记忆，一个永远无法忘记的背影。
那也许只是极其短暂的两情相悦，只是一种单恋，或只是一种只存在于虚幻空间。
一切看起来是那么平静，那么和谐。

没有惊天动地，没有海誓山盟，没有花前月下，没有浪漫，没有誓言，没有温度。水瓶座的理智和冷漠，注定了任何感情永无燃点。

水瓶座不容易喜欢上一个人。有人说水瓶座对伴侣的要求太高，其实并非这样，水瓶座注重的是感觉。只是那么轻描淡写的一眼，那个人已经吸引了水瓶的所有注意力，从此目光便无法转移。

用一秒钟爱上一个人，然后再付出一生去忘记，水瓶座就是这样的试验品。
但几乎所有的水瓶都会否认在自己的身上发生一见钟情，因为一向自视清高，承认爱上一个人这钟事似乎是在侮辱自己的智商。
更多的时候是因为，连自己都没发现已经爱上。水瓶座很多时候对于感情反应非常迟钝，迟钝到每次都是最后的知情者。有时容易出现弄不清自己的感觉，不清楚自己想做什么，觉得迷惘。

在对方没有非常明确地表示感情时会退怯，觉得爱情是两厢情愿，不想勉强对方。
显得很被动，忽冷忽热，犹豫不决，极其矛盾。在没有完全确定前，决不轻易付出感情，因为怕失去。也许是缺乏安全感，也许是对自己的保护，也可以算作是一种自私。
一般水瓶座的好朋友都是经过很长世间的考察的，不仅仅是几年，而是十几年。一旦被水瓶座当作好朋友的，会赴汤蹈火掏心掏肺。

在公车上，街边，商场，水瓶老是认错人。在茫茫人海中，始终在寻找一个熟悉的身影，直到产生幻觉。
这一刻，水瓶座突然很想痛哭流涕，因为突然发现自己几近疯狂的爱上一个人，失去了理智，失去了自我。这种突如其来的感觉，很恐惧，很无助。

水瓶座不喜欢这种感觉，因为不知该如何面对。要让水瓶座主动去追逐，是件异常困难的事，在水瓶座的世界里无法承受拒绝，就是这么脆弱，无论表面上看来是多么的坚强。
水瓶座在人前总是一幅无忧无虑没心没肝的样子，不想别人看见自己的悲伤，那样会有不安全的感觉，总是在无人的地方暗自落泪。

算了，还是放在心里吧。既不用尴尬的表白然后遭到拒绝，又不会相爱容易相处难的惨烈分手。这样很好，没人看出来，不至于太没面子。可以继续貌似潇洒。

但是，不同了。尽管水瓶座装着多么不在乎，看都不看一眼。可是对方说的每句话都从耳朵进去，没见出来。对方提的任何过分的要求，水瓶座统统照单全收精心尽力，决对不会有半个不字。完全成为一个爱情的奴隶，脸上还装酷无表情，整个死要面子活受罪。
这 种情况下，如果对方使点阴谋诡计，刻意疏远避而不见或是视而不见，电话不接或是哼哈敷衍等等，水瓶会给整疯了，开始会想是什么自己地方做错了，说错话了， 然后拉下面子主动讨好试探。不用多，碰壁两次，水瓶座就会有自知之明了，不会再去想是为什么会这样，也不想知道了。心里会想，原来是对方讨厌自己，不想见 到自己。明白之后，就是绝对的安静了。

这还没完，过了一段日子。对方如果突然又改变态度，水瓶座竟然能既往不咎问也不问，殷勤依旧，完全没有尊严可谈。只要能和对方开心的在一起，过去不重要，未来也不重要，面子不重要，金钱不重要，时间不重要，自己也不重要。
天平失衡，感情重重的压在心底，自己却飘在了半空。太在乎对方，迷失了自我，幸福也变得虚无。

自己都不爱，谁还会珍惜。
水瓶座一旦付出，便是彻底，不可收回。
感情投入的越多越是伤的重。

最擅长的是难为自己。不想对方难过，只好让自己难过。总是认为自己有超乎寻常的承受力，把自己想得太坚强，而把别人想得太脆弱。不知道，受伤的其实是自己，只是不知道如何表现出来。

爱，这个字对水瓶座来说，太沉重珍贵了，无法用语言诠释。一旦说出口，犹如远古的文物，被发掘出土暴露于空气中，变得面目全非，失去本来的价值。
所以，不轻易说。

只需一次，水瓶座便把一生的精力耗尽，只因执著，便落得伤痕累累。那段感情如强酸腐蚀着那颗麻木的心，穿了一个洞，再也无法弥补。时间是世界上最有力的矬子，把空洞的毛边渐渐抚平，不再搁人。每当寒风吹过，犹闻隐约凄凉的萧萧声，似挽歌。

只需一次，水瓶座便不再幻想，于是狠狠将自己摔碎，拒绝熔化拼凑。因为怕熔了记忆，怕熔了那个远远的背影，怕熔了自己千年的期盼。
之后，水瓶座依然谈笑风生，依然开朗豁达，继续着一段接一段的新感情，重复着一切，因为无法承受寂寞。

人们都说水瓶花心，见一个爱一个，水瓶座会哈哈一笑，说“哪有？冤啊！”。其实心里在滴着血，脸上却得笑的灿烂，安慰自己“我是谁啊！哪会那么弱呢！”

有人说水瓶座太冷酷太自私，自以为了不起。可是谁又了解，水瓶座的心，容量很小，只能有一个，且不具修改性。除了那个人，其他所有自动归为一种程序。

因为无法虚伪，所以甜言蜜语都吝啬给予。因为天真，所以至死之前仍在等待。因为没有勇气，所以眼睁睁放手真爱无能为力。

当看到一个瓶子在疯狂地快乐或悲伤时，请千万不要被迷惑，水瓶总是不由自主地交错操纵着快乐与悲伤。其实并不像看到的那么快乐，同样的，也不像看到的那么悲伤。只是悲伤时，喜欢带上快乐的面具，而当水瓶快乐时，悲伤又不肯轻易放过。

只有真正懂得水瓶座的人，才能看见眼底那一缕似有似无的哀伤，才能明白是什么让水瓶如此的义无反顾，是什么让水瓶变得如此忽冷忽热捉摸不定，才能体会水瓶的坚强只是竭力掩饰的脆弱。

星相上说，水瓶座往往不被所爱的人珍惜。我想，是为什么呢？也许答案就在心中，只是水瓶座的本性不愿承认而已。
水瓶座除了需要一个深爱自己包容一切的人以外，还需要一个心理医生.

Pass IPPT!

Walked 16km route march on the rainy Tuesday. Though it was raining, it's much better than walking under the hot sun. I'd rather my uniform being drenched with rain than sweat. Moreover, it felt cooling although we were shivering during the 15min break which was held after every 4 km.

Good news! I passed my actual IPPT on Friday! Although my results don't seem to be as spectacular as you expect, I am satisfied since I'm not aiming to go into command schools. Here goes my results:

• Sit-up: 43 [5]
• SBJ: 225 cm [3]
• Shuttle Run: 10.1 s [5]
• Chin-up: 7 [2] (Just 1 more and I could have gotten Silver; but it's okay)
  
• 2.4km run: approx 11 min 10 s [3]

Anyway, I'm glad that I've got IPPT test over and done with. At least there's no more Remedial Trainings on weekends.

9 more days to POP. On the high note, Block Leave is coming real soon and it lasts till 230309. However, it also means that I wouldn't be able to see my section and platoon mates anymore as all of us will most probably be sent into different units and vocations; it'll be difficult to meet up. Mixed feelings.

field camp

Gosh, I've actually survived the 6D5N field camp without showering, getting adequate hours of sleep nor shitting!

I shall say that this field camp was a rather memorable one. Could you imagine yourself surviving in jungle for almost a week? It got really cold in the night, especially when we're wearing uniform that's completely soaked with sweat. And yes, I didn't brush my teeth for the first 3 days cuz I couldn't find my toothbrush and toothpaste that were deeply buried in my field pack. I could feel the layer of plaque that was formed on my teeth. Yucks! Of course, physical training is part and parcel of any activities in army.

Okay, I shall not condemn so much. The most important reason that pushes me on is that I know I'm not suffering alone. Despite the exhaustion, the dirt and the heat rash that developed on my back, I just carry on doing what I was supposed to do, though, I must say, I don't really see why I was even there but I treated it as another experience that I must go through.

The reason to rejoice about now is that I've fulfilled the requirements to complete BMT and I won't be asked to go for recourse. The last component is IPPT for which a diagnostic test will be conducted tomorrow! =.=" I shan't say anything - whatever will be will be.

You know what, I actually wanted myself to fall sick since the first week but I simply can't! LOL. Much as I want to skip IPPT and SOC, I can't because I've no valid reason. Falling sick is the only way for me but I couldn't. No way will I ever attempt to malinger as it's an offence. Sigh. [Diao~~~ (I know)]

powder bath week

Pretty fun week. "BANG!" Haha.

And it's field camp for the coming week. I foresee myself going to the field camp site looking green and probably coming back brown, because of the mud if it rains, which I really hope it won't. Just let tekong be free of any raindrops for this week, heaven. Anyway, I will never do big business as far as possible. Lol.

There'd be IPPT trial test the week after next. So shitty.

BMT

6 more weeks to endure through before POP. Gonna book-in later at 20 15.
I dunno about Singapore mainland but I've not seen any raindrops in Tekong since 070109. Damn it. Boiling hot. It's made even more uncomfortable for me as I'm one who perspires like nobody business. The only short moment I enjoy is after my shower. It's just refreshing.

To book-out, I must book-in. That means that I'd have to endure at least 5 days per week. And mind you, each day in Tekong is as if it has been 3 days in mainland.

Expecting more RTs for myself since I'm expected to pass IPPT, which I thought is rather difficult. Somehow, I've lost the desire to pass this test after doing it for so many years already. Lame.

Expectation sucks.
EZ-link adult fare sucks.

P.S.: Gonna have dessers at Ji De Chi, JP2 with my family before booking-in later. (Durian, I'm coming!) =p

dread to enter NS =(

First of all, though it's a bit late, Happy New Year 2009! =D

It's been quite a while since my last entry. Have been rather busy for the past month but definitely I've led an enriching and rewarding life. Not only do I work to earn, I also work to learn, which is far more essential than the former. Ultimately, it's the skills you've acquired that you can truly make use of and make it big in life. Of course, I also got the chance to meet different kinds of people and make many new friends indeed! Making new friends is the best part, I'd think. Throughout my short journey, I learnt new life lessons which gave me a new perspective towards what the reality of today's world is like. I got to know more about myself too, and have especially understood that there're areas for improvements which I would like and must improve upon to become a better person. For instance, I sort of know how to communicate better, at least. Attended my last group-up before entering NS this afternoon, and once again I learn something: Most people would decide to change their profession just because they didn't see the results yet in their current profession, but the question is how sure are they that they can succeed in their next field of choice when they haven't even persist long enough to see how far they can go in their current profession? This has enlightened me as I was really feeling down the past few days because of the obstacles I faced and I actually wasted my time wallowing in self-despair. (I may look fine and relax but I'm not.) I count myself fortunate to have the chance to learn directly from the successful leaders.

Gonna to be enlisted on 7th Jan 09 and need to report at 10.30am. I really dread to enter NS but I've got no choice, do I? I was actually really looking forward to NS life because I supposed it would be like the Student Council camps that build camaraderie with fellow mates until I heard testimonials from those serving the nation or ORD already that NS life is really boring and is a waste of time. Of course, it may be a matter of perception but the ratio of number of people telling my NS is a waste of time far outweighs those who said the opposite. Till now, I've never heard of anyone saying that NS is fun. Well, how could I have had such a projection of NS life, right? Perhaps in a few days' time when I am undergoing BMT, I would be lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, having thoughts such as: What the hell am I doing here in the middle of the night? =.-"
And I have not finshed packing my stuff yet; I just hope that I don't have to care at all! Not only have I not packed my stuff, I haven't been training physically at all! Not even jogging or whatsoever. And I've just visualised myself panting ferociously.

Personally, I have many limitations for me to break through. One of them is that I dislike people to set goals or expectations for me even though goal-setting is important to success or one will be doing things blindly. The end-result is either I achieve the goals or I haven't; it's a 50:50 kind of thing. When I did not manage to meet the expectations, not only will the goal-setters be disappointed, I myself feel disappointed as well. Not that I'll always fail but just that there's a higher probability for me not to meet the expectations - that's the problem. I'd rather no people to set goals for me so that the above-mentioned won't happen. But the reality is that I will only end up doing things blindly without a vision in mind. I do understand the importance of goal-settings, and not to change the goals whatever the circumstances might be if we want to achieve success, and yes I'll have to break this limit, somehow.

I'd want to highlight that there's a difference between business and interests. Business is something which you involve in that allows you to put money into your pocket so as to at least sustain a living; interests are things which you engage in because you enjoy doing them. To date, my interest has not changed - Dance.

Alright, this should be my last entry before somebody shaves off my hair after paying 2 bucks. Till then, ta-ta!


Please, do not give promises if you do not have the intention to fulfil them. It's heart-breaking.